Going for my first run in almost a year, since I found out I was pregnant. Scared, excited, and feeling like a total dork. But I’ve decided I’m going to run the Condura marathon next year, after I’ve stopped breastfeeding. And if that goes well, I’d like to try the Dream Marathon and the CamSur one. After what I went through delivering my child, I feel like I can do anything.

Dear Corwin,

Today, we decided to travel the world with you. Not all at once, but maybe 2-3 short trips every year. Or one proper long trip every year and live like locals if we’re lucky. This year, we’re going to Japan for 5 days, and you’ll be turning a year old in Hong Kong, where we’ll be staying for 4 days this November. Next year, we’re planning to spend a few days in Korea, and 2 weeks in California. In 2014, we’re hoping for 3 weeks in Italy and France. In 2015, it’ll be Australia and New Zealand. There’s still so much of the world I’ve yet to see, and I can’t wait to see it all with you.

Love,
Mommy

Be My Baby
The Ronettes

♬ I’ll make you happy, baby, just wait and see. For every kiss you give me, I’ll give you three. So won’t you please be my, be my baby. Be my little baby. ♬

The husband and I have taken to going out for quick dates while Corwin’s asleep with the nanny watching over him. It physically hurt me to leave him the first time, but it’s become a bit more bearable. I do my best not to call often to check up on them. Anyway, they always play this song at our favorite hangout these days, and it’s stuck in my head tonight. It makes me want to order a milkshake with two straws.

(Source: fortunesonastring)

#afternoons

I am not depressed. I just like sad bastard music.

My favorite part of the day is when he stops in the middle of feeding, leans back and looks at me intently, and softly, earnestly coos with as much love as his little body can muster.

My son is getting baptized in an hour. He obviously cannot contain his excitement.

Dear Corwin,

You kept us up ‘till 4:30am today. If you ever want to know what it’s like to be holding on desperately to the last shreds of your sanity while half asleep, have a child.

You’re such a sweet little boy though, when you’re not playing it fast and loose with my mental health. You’re incredibly gassy at night, for reasons that shall forever escape me, and you either refuse to poop or do it too much. You wake up smiling and laughing though, and this somehow makes up for all of it.

You’ve always been animated, but you’re even more so now. You coo and gurgle with much insistence, as if you’re saying Very Important Things that I should pay close attention to. And I do. Your dad fascinates you to no end, and you prefer him for play. But nothing comforts you like I do, and I love that. You hold on to me with your little hands while you feed, and it melts my heart so completely.

I saw a video about the language of babies and it has helped us tremendously these past three days. “Neh” means you’re hungry. “Eh” means you have to burp. “Owh” means you’re sleepy. I repeat the word while taking care of your need and the delighted look on your face whenever you realize I actually understand you now is funny.

Your doctor remains pleased with your development, saying you’re quite advanced. Full range of neck movement, and you recognize colors way beyond RBW, among other things. We’re managing your atopic dermatitis by eliminating everything in the world I love to eat. This makes me sad, but I’ll live. I’ll get so fat when I stop breastfeeding.

I have to go to work now. It hurts like hell to leave you.

Love,
Mommy

P.S. Please stop scratching your face.

Car rides.

I’ve been here since 2009 and all you’ve ever known of me were random iPhone photos and the songs stuck in my head ‘till recently. When I got pregnant, I started looking for other places to blog about the experience because I figured you’ve gotten used to very specific things here, and that the pregnancy and motherhood bits of my life won’t really fit. But today, it occurred to me that it really shouldn’t matter. My life has changed so much this past year, and my blog should be able to grow with it. I’ll probably lose a few hundred followers, and that’s sad, but I’ll just have to live with that. I keep missing this place. It’s been like a second home to me for over two years now. So I’m back. With a redesign, too. Hi. :)

Bohemian Rhapsody
Queen

I moved in with my dad when I hit 1st grade. I was 6. He was in his mid-20s, younger than I am now. I missed my mom and was used to my mom singing me to sleep, so I asked my dad to sing me a lullaby. The only song he could sing off the top of his head was this. So this became my lullaby growing up.

My son was fussy tonight so I played this on my phone and sang along. He calmed down. We’re off to a good start, little one.

(Source: trixiecee)