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Monthly Archives: October 2012

Dear Corwin,

We celebrated Halloween in the village last Sunday. We stayed on the outskirts because there were too many people and it was such a hot afternoon, but you kept pointing to the crowd and insisting we join them. How two introverts gave birth to an extrovert like you, I’ll never understand. I cannot help but be proud that you’re so sweet and friendly, and the neighbors all know you by name. I feel like we’re doing a fairly decent job of raising you, and that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

There’s this girl in the village that we say hi to everyday. She’s almost a year older than you, I think. I like her because she looks like the girl version of you. You have the same hair, and of course, I think that’s funny. She’s been trying to teach you the parts of your face lately. At the party, she followed you around touching parts of your face repeatedly and naming them while you “ran away”. You’re not quite there with the running just yet though, so she always caught up with you. So you stopped and growled and hissed, and gave her your scariest monster face. Then you’d run, she’d chase, and you’d try your best to scare her off all over again. I couldn’t stop laughing. Oh, my son.

I am told this might happen more as you get older. First lesson, we do not growl and hiss at the ladies. I shall teach you how to run instead. Haha. Okay, I can laugh this off now because you’re 11 months and it’s insanely hilarious. We’ll talk about this again when you’re older and I can take it seriously. Speaking of running, daddy just finished his second half-marathon the morning of that same day, and he shaved a full 10 minutes off his personal record. We are so proud of him, love.

In the meantime, we walk. You walk unassisted from one end of your playmat to the other, between your father and me, giggling the entire time then diving into the nearest parent’s arms. You look so ecstatic that you’re actually WALKING now. Like a big boy! My sweet darling. I look at your smiling face and even the long days just wash right off.

Love,
Mommy

Dear Corwin,

I’ve been sick with the flu all week. Your father has been incredibly sweet, taking care of me and picking up the slack, both at work and with you. When we’re not out shooting, I’ve been in bed resting, trying to get better. You would play on your playmat beside me and would “visit” me every 15 minutes or so, to do one or two or all of the following:
– bite my knee playfully to tickle me
– launch your torso across mine and just hang there for a second or two
– kiss my cheek with your mouth open
– pretend-eat me, with chewing and all
– dance
– blow bubbles on my tummy
– make monster faces and growl at me
– rest your head on my tummy and smile sweetly up at me
– bang wooden blocks on my bones

You are so active, playful, and bright. You’re also quite the handful, but I love it. I love you. You make my heart smile like nothing else can.

You’re going as Batman this Halloween. That was pretty much decided as soon as we found out we were having a boy. You look ridiculously adorable in your batsuit, and it makes me want to gnaw on you a little bit.

Love,
Mommy

Dear Corwin,

These photos are of us when you were two months old, back when you did very few things outside of sleeping, eating, and passing gas. One of them was posing for pictures with me on the front-facing camera of my iPhone while daddy was asleep. The picture quality isn’t very good, and part of mommy’s job is to mind when it actually isn’t, but it kept you interested and us occupied. I let go and just enjoyed it.

You’re turning a year old in two weeks, and I’m getting nostalgic, way more than usual. There’s so much of you I already miss. I comfort myself with the thought that there is so much more to look forward to.

You attended a birthday party yesterday and you clapped along with the older kids. You were so serious and you acted all grown-up, I wanted to laugh and cry. Time goes by so fast.

You took your first steps today, at 11 months and 2 weeks. You’ve been scooting for a long time now, but this evening before your bath, you took 3 steps all on your own before you dove into your father’s arms. It was all I could do not to scream in excitement. Okay, maybe I did. I’m so proud of you, my love.

Sometimes I try to remember what it was like before you came along, and it feels like a lifetime ago. I believe that life has a way of working out and giving you exactly what you need when you need it the most. You were exactly what I needed when you came along. I doubt I will ever be able to explain this to you in a way that does it justice, but very simply, you changed me. You saved me. You’ve made me understand love in a way that I never have before.

Love,
Mommy

Dear Corwin,

These past two days have been rough on all of us. You decided to become a toddler a bit early, and whined and cried over every little thing while mommy was suffering from heat exhaustion. Oh, my dear child. If you ever wonder how much I love you, you need look no further for proof. I haven’t sold you yet! Okay, that’s a joke. You have great comedic timing now. I hope you still have a sense of humor by the time you read this. You’ll need it to survive your parents.

You point at things more often now and demand that you be taken to them AT ONCE. Everything is of Utmost Importance. You also have a fake cry, which is hilarious. I have to stop myself from laughing so as not to encourage this behavior. You actually chuckle a few seconds after you fake-cry, and I have this on video, preserved for all eternity.

You are sweet and friendly though, and have a ready smile for our neighbors who all look out for you. The children in the playground say hi to you when you pass by. Your titas, lolos, and lolas drop by very often to play with you. People love you and care for you, and you should never ever forget that.

You make little monster faces when you’re feeling playful. You try to cute your way out of things, and it is dangerously effective. There’s a mischievous boyness to you that I find so precious and endearing. You point to the basketball hoop outside and smile with such joy when we pretend to play basketball, and you giggle nonstop when I hop while carrying you when I take you out. Last week, you walked (assisted) to the middle of the park and watched the older kids play with your brow furrowed, trying to figure out what they were doing.

You’ve taken to sleeping on our bed every night now. You don’t sleep well unless you’re hugging your dad. The both of you snore lightly, by the way. It’s cute and funny, and I love you both so much it hurts. I’m going to stop writing to snuggle you both now.

Love,
Mommy

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Currently planning a small and intimate lunch with relatives next month, to celebrate Corwin’s first birthday. The husband and I introverts and averse to the idea of hosting large parties so this is definitely not a party, just a small gathering over good comfort food. I am in denial, obviously. But I’m happy at the thought of Corwin surrounded by so many people who love him all at once.

The theme is inspired by one of his favorite books, Rocket Town. Jeff’s drawing some rockets and we’ll be using them on, well, everything. Little centerpieces, the cake, giveaways, and whatever else I can think of. Okay, maybe I’m a little bit excited.

Dear Corwin,

You turned 11 months yesterday. We celebrated it by having lunch out with your dad. You smiled at the waitress each time she was at our table. We also went to the play gym, and you had a great time exploring. You finally went through the tunnels. I’m so proud of you, my brave little man.

One of my favorite things in the world these days is when you lay on top of me in bed at night, with the both of us facing up, while I sing songs and act them out with my hands. You love Twinkle, Twinkle, especially the part where it goes, “Like a diamond in the sky” when I make a diamond shape with my hands and bring it down to your face. This makes you giggle like mad. I love your giggles. It’s one of the best sounds ever.

You’ve taken to tilting your head sometimes to look at us inquisitively, and you like to rest your head on a pillow with a sweet smile on your face, both of which melt me completely. My voice goes all high-pitched and I squish you with hugs and kisses, and you smile the smile of a child who knows he is loved.

These past couple of weeks of teething have been rough on you, and most nights now, you end up between us because you toss and turn in your own bed from the pain. Somehow, sleeping between us comforts you enough to sleep through the rest of the night. I’m thrilled to have you back in bed with us. I spend a significant amount of my late evenings sniffing your head and your arms. You don’t smell like pancake batter anymore, but it’s still pretty amazing. I’ve missed snuggling you while you sleep.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what I’m trying to do here. I’m not documenting your world; I figure you can do that yourself when you’re older, if you are so inclined. I am documenting mine. My world is almost all about you now, but the voice with which I record it is still mine. The thoughts and feelings and point of view are mine.

I’m trying to show you exactly how I see you. I want you to see how I’ve always seen you and everything that you are, and all the ways that I love you, with all that I am. I want you to have these photographs and letters to come back to every time you need them, and know that my love will forever hold you and keep you.

Love,
Mommy

The Lisa Show has moved from Tumblr to WordPress. The most recent posts are here already, but I’m still looking for a way to import the rest of the posts, which are still on thelisashow.tumblr.com. That’s four years’ worth of blogging right there. I’ve been wanting to move for some time, and yesterday, I just got fed up. Nothing on Tumblr works the way it should. They don’t even have an export tool. I mean, COME ON.

Anyway, a large part of my hesitation to move sooner was because I really, really like sharing the music I listen to, and they made that easy. And today, I figured out how to post audio files here on WordPress. If you’ve been following this blog for some time, you would understand exactly how happy that makes me.

So here’s what’s been stuck in my head all day long, thanks (or no thanks, depends on how you see it) to The Perks of Being a Wallflower and my husband.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Come on Eileen – Dexys Midnight Runners

♬ Come on, Eileen. I swear at this moment you mean everything. ♬

This is the kind of song you dance crazily to in your living room, with your eyes closed. Just saying.

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Dear Corwin,

We got you a new toy a few days ago, because you reached for it in the store. We don’t buy you toys often. The last time we got you one was about 3 months ago. We get you books instead, and we just play with what you do have and household objects.

When I handed you the toy, you looked up at us as if you were going, “Really?? This is mine??? I get something new and shiny?!” and my heart broke a little. I felt like the world’s worst mother because I don’t get around to buying you new toys regularly.

And then it got old and you ignored it the next day. Sigh.

Back to old magazines and tissue boxes then.

Love,
Mommy

P.S. Look at you standing on your own! You fall on your bum after a few seconds but you keep trying anyway. That’s my boy.